Life On The B Side

Taking all that life throws at us one moment at a time

Time Away November 8, 2011

I wasn’t sure it was a good idea at all.  He’s my baby.  He’s my difficult to figure out and understand baby.  The one that speaks his own language and gestures and grunts to communicate.  The one that likes to be around familiar things and people.  The one who warms up to a very few people.  The one that is unpredictable … yet so predictable.  The one who can slay you with his smile but when he’s mad … look out!


His Uncle came to pick him up one evening a few nights ago.  He was to spend 9 whole days with his Grandma and his 2 Uncles.  9 whole days away from home.  Away from me.  We’d never been apart for so long before.  I was scared and worried (for him, for them, for me).  I cried as they walked out the door.  I was so nervous about how he would behave and if they would have the necessary patience for him.  I was nervous that he would be angry that he was there and that he would spend the entire time miserable and crying.  I didn’t want that for him.  I was nervous that they wouldn’t know what he wants or needs.  I was nervous that they wouldn’t appreciate his wonderful unique-ness.  I was nervous that he would make their lives difficult.  I was nervous that he wouldn’t eat or poop properly.  (TMI?  Sorry) 

The 1st night was so difficult for me.  I cried a lot.  The next morning I called to check on him and I got nothing but good news.  HE WAS HAPPY!


I went to see them this past weekend and I was so excited to see how he would react to seeing me and his brother.  At 1st, he didn’t seem to care much that we were there.  Then something clicked and he was all over me.  It felt great.  We spent the day hanging out and I heard all about how well behaved he had been up to then and how he didn’t give any trouble and he’s been happy and easy to take care of and they have loved having him there.  Basically, I heard how he’s not the kid I had warned them about, instead he is every bit the kid I KNOW. 

Maybe, he just loves being the only kid in the house so he doesn’t have to share and his toys are exactly where he left them every single time (just like his Dad was according to Grandma G).  Or he is an attention hog and loves getting attention and spoiling from 4 adults.  Or he has me figured out and tries to get away with things at home because I’m easy.  Or he figured, he’s stuck there so he may as well make the best of it lest they stop feeding him cereal bars and ravioli and start forcing him to do terrible things like going to bed on time and … cleaning up after himself … YIKES!!!


Whatever, the reason for his good behaviour I’m so glad for it.  I’m glad the in-laws are seeing and getting to know my delightful boy.  I think it’s good that he went.  I think it’s good that the rest of the family get to know him.  Really KNOW him.  I think it’s good that he gets new experiences.  I think it’s good that he gets a break from routine and home work and he gets to just chill.  I think it’s good for me to know that he can be ok even if he’s not in my line of sight.  I think it’s good that he get time away from his brother and his brother gets time away from him.  I think it’s good that CC and I feel comfortable asking for and accepting help. 


He’s still there.  God, I miss him like crazy. 

Ace is loving having me all to himself but he misses Jay something awful <– That’s both beautiful and heartbreaking. 

I’m so looking forward to him coming home.


3 Responses to “Time Away”

  1. Michelle Says:

    9 days must be so hard, but like you say I do think it’s good for them. I’ve let both of mine go to their grandparents for one or two nights, but not separated them before. I think this could be a good idea too from time to time.

    • We’ve split them before as I do think they need a break from each other sometimes. Usually though we send Ace and we keep Jay. I just always think we’re the only ones who can manage him or who will want to put up with him. Guess I’m wrong.

  2. that sounds both wonderful and really really hard. I am so glad to hear it’s working for him and you.

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