life on the "j" train

Taking a "busy working mom with 2 special needs kids" life one moment at a time

To Do or Not To Do December 20, 2011

Filed under: Life on the Jay train — the jay train @ 12:55 pm
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In case you haven’t noticed, it’s Christmas time.  There’s stuff to do.  Not the shopping and the gift wrapping. 

The  social activities.  Parties and pot lucks and shows and a Rockefeller tree and store windows and pictures with Santa and school concerts and toy drives and (if I have my way), ice-skating.  Stuff that would be fun for a normal family.

 

I love all these things but if you’ve been reading along you don’t need me to tell you that.  I’m a social being.  Lord knows Ace is a social being.  Nothing gets him to behave in school better than a promise to go out and do something fun if he does well. 

CC and Jay … not as much.  They’re not ANTI-social … but they’re not me and Ace. 

 

I don’t worry too much about CC and whether or not he wants to do something.  I drag him all over the place because he’s good like that.  I try to only drag him to the things that are MOST interesting to me but ultimately, he’ll do things he wouldn’t necessarily choose to do just because he knows it makes me happy.  (I love you and appreciate it baby)

 

With Jay it’s not so easy.  I have to take his interests/desires/limitations into consideration.  It’s hard to know when I should ease up and let the kid just stay home and play by himself or when I should push it and plan activities.  I don’t want him to miss out.  I don’t want to deprive him of fun if at all possible.  But heaven knows, I don’t want to force him into things that will make him totally miserable. 

 

 …..

 

This Thursday, at my job we’re having our annual pot luck.  People bring their kids to work with them and we have fun and games and Santa and lots of food.  I work in an office with about 70 people and most have little kids so it gets a little noisy.   Ace has been in years past and thinks it’s wonderful.  Due to a very important kindergarten obligation he can’t make it this year, but Jay can.  I’ve gone  back and forth on whether or not I should bring him.  There will be no escape once we’re here.  We’ll be all in and he could love it or it could go horribly wrong. 

I’ve decided to bring him because the idea of him not even getting a chance at the fun is too much for me.  Wish us luck.  I guess I can always hide out in the bathroom if he starts to melt down.    

 

 …..

 

On Friday we’re leaving to go to MD for Christmas.  I’m excited.  We’ll be with friends who are really more like family.  They will understand if we opt out of any of the fun things they have planned but there is talk of a lights show and an ice show and brunches and dinners galore. 

 

We’ll play the weekend by air.  We’ll see what kind of mood Jay is in before we commit to anything specific.  I really hope that as a family we can enjoy this weekend and all the festivities that go along with a long, busy, Christmas weekend.  I also hope that if for any reason we have to stay home while others are out living it up, I won’t feel slighted or resentful and if I do get those negative feelings I hope I don’t take my frustrations out on CC. 

 

*** To Be Continued ***

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3 Responses to “To Do or Not To Do”

  1. good luck, have fun, and merry Christmas!

  2. Mike Says:

    We wish you all the very best and hope that you all have a great time.

  3. rhemashope Says:

    oh, tomorrow’s the day of the office pot luck. i’ll be thinking of you and saying a little prayer for you both.
    Merry Christmas, friend, to you and your beautiful family!


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