Life On The B Side

Taking all that life throws at us one moment at a time

There’s Always Next Year July 17, 2013

Filed under: Life on the Jay train — The B Side @ 5:53 pm
Tags: , , ,

It’s time I told you … Jay got kicked out of his summer camp.
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Up until yesterday, I was still getting happy comments on my last post . The one about his teacher calling before taking them on a trip to the movies. The one where I was all set to run out and buy them cookies. The one that was written less than a week ago. 5 days to be exact. Yeah, that one.
Every time I read a new comment, I felt guilty for not updating you.
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This past Monday, I got a call that Jay was having a rough day and they wanted to know if I had any tricks that they could use.
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He was yelling at the counselors and being defiant.
He was wandering off.
He was getting upset at the simplest things – such as not being able to buckle his own shorts after going to the bathroom.
He was not joining in on any activities and not playing with any of the other kids.
.
I spoke to the same very nice teacher and gave her some tips.
I spent the rest of the day with a knot in my tummy and tears teasing behind my eye lids.
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On Monday evening, Jay got off the bus, red in the face and in a sour mood. He wouldn’t even walk home. CC carried him inside.
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On Tuesday, Jay didn’t want to go to school. He kept saying “No school” as he clung tightly to CC.
We put him in elastic waist shorts and sent him anyway.
Before it was lunch time, I got a call from his teacher asking if someone was available to come pick Jay up.
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That was it.
They were done.
He was done.
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I’m sad about this. I had really hoped he would have a happy summer there.
I’ve spent a lot of time since Monday wondering why it didn’t work out. I’ve wondered if he was just being bad/spoilt or if someone there was being mean to him and his screaming and wandering off was his way of communicating something to them/us. I’ve wondered what it is about my son that made him so difficult that a group of people who are supposedly trained to deal with special needs kids couldn’t handle him. Is he really THAT much of a handful? Was the staff just THAT sucky?
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Either way, I’m glad we have the option of keeping him home all summer. I’m not going to fight with them or even try to educate them. I don’t want him with people who don’t want him around and I certainly don’t want him to feel like we force him into uncomfortable or worse, unsafe, situations even when he tries to let us know.
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Once I stopped licking my heart wounds I was able to get to this point. The same place other moms have had to get to. I thank them for writing about their own personal evolutions. It helped me tremendously to accept this situation and to stay positive.

Just like Outrunning The Storm, I’m calling my attitude about all this a win.

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4 Responses to “There’s Always Next Year”

  1. Sounds like they didn’t have the right kind of training. And yes, he’s likely happier with you. Sorry it didn’t work out.

    I am constantly amazed when I attend meetings at my son’s school for special ed and when I ask the table of people (his teacher, the special ed teacher, the school counselor, the district psychologist and principal) if they know what Sensory Processing Disorder is, NO ONE knows. How can you teach special ed children when you are not familiar with what’s going on with them???

  2. I am sorry there seems to be a club of us now. It is sad to see how unprepared the world can be for our kids. But, I always think of Jay as such a happy guy, if he was resisting there was definately something amiss. I am glad you are moving on.

  3. Lisa Says:

    Well this isn’t the update I wanted to see. I’m sorry it didn’t work out. Like Outrunning the Storm said, from what you write about Jay, the behaviors don’t sound typical to HIS demeanor. SOMETHING was going on.

    I’m glad he can be home and have some time to decompress this summer. I agree that sometimes we have to move on and chalk up the experience as a win…because at least we tried.

  4. Krystal Says:

    I’m so sorry that this is what happened. But one thing I have learned is that our children’s behavior is indicative of their attempts to communicate something to us. Who knows, next year might be better…but I’m glad you have realized you are not alone in this ((HUGS))


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