Life On The B Side

Taking all that life throws at us one moment at a time

One Cocoa December 11, 2013

Jay is not very good about sitting and listening to a story.  Sometimes I can hold his attention for a while but rarely does he make it to the end of the book.  This surprises me because he is very much interested in words and the alphabet.  He spends A LOT of his day reciting the alphabet, writing the alphabet and watching youtube videos of people singing the alphabet song.  He watches the videos in both in American and British english and uses both “zee” and “zed”.  Through youtube, he’s even learning the alphabet in sign language.  He loves to tell me what letter different words start with and will draw pictures representing each letter.

He’s even trying to read.

I am a reader.  I really want to encourage his reading and I do believe that one day he will be competent at it.  I want to help him get there faster but I just don’t know how to harness it.

Efforts to get him to read a simple story with me are futile; yet he will attempt to read the error message that pops up on the TV screen when we’re having Netflix trouble.  Trying to get him to do his homework – even though it’s fairly easy – is a struggle, but he tries to read the names on Storefronts and uses magnetic letters to spell out words that he already knows on our fridge.   Each of the boys got a Christmas card in the mail yesterday.  He tried to read his own and was able to read some of the words and I helped him with the others.  Even Ace was shocked at how many words Jay could recognize in the card and high-fived him.  I picked up Ace’s card and asked Jay to read that one also but he pushed it away and very politely said “No thank you” and that was that.


Maybe it’s not for me to harness.  Maybe, like with so many other things, I need to learn to let go and let things happen in their own time and in their own way.  But I get so excited when I see Jay learning.  It’s hard not to get greedy for more and to just swallow the little nuggets.


But as Jamaican people say – One one cocoa full basket.  That means, even with moving slowly, eventually you will accomplish what you want to.  I should know by now that there is never any rushing my boy.  So, I will take my individual cocoas when I’m offered them and be happy with that.


6 Responses to “One Cocoa”

  1. Neil Says:

    “One one cocoa full basket”. LOVE this. I’m going to start using that one. He’s on his own timeline, that’s all. YOU see what’s important, and it’s not everyone else’ timeline.

  2. I so get this. Mine were obsessed with and learned the alphabet really early and then no interest in learning to read. My asd son struggled with reading at first. He memorizes the words. He wasn’t interested because it was not easy, but this year it seems to have clicked. I see him reading books on his own more often. He’d still rather watch it on a screen but, the reading came. He still seems to only learn words by memorizing them – no phonics- but it seems to be working for him. Jay will get there. He is just focused on the letters for now.

  3. rhemashope Says:

    I like that saying a lot. And ditto Neil.

    And go Jay!!! He IS learning and growing so much!

  4. Those are great early signs! It’s kind of like potty training. 🙂 It seems like the interest is there, and that’s the most important thing. My son started by memorizing, too. That’s the first step…in time a “switch” may flip and he may just decide he’s ready. My son still learns first by memorizing, and this worried me, because it seems like you need to at some point “get” the phonics and learn to sound words out, etc., but he makes it work. Our kiddos will probably always lean towards memorization first and foremost.

  5. Kim Says:

    I feel you, as I’ve felt the same with my guy! But Neil is spot on, he is on his own timeline–a good reminder for me tonight. 🙂

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