Life On The B Side

Taking all that life throws at us one moment at a time

Post Noah December 15, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — The B Side @ 8:44 am

For the past 3 years Jay has had one main friend; Noah.  They were 2 out of 6 children who began kindergarten in the same self-contained (Autistic) class.  In that program, the same teacher (and an aide) brings the students from kindergarten to 3rd grade.  It allows the teachers to really develop a strong relationship with each student.  They were a close-knit group of 8.  Well, for kindergarten and 1st grade they were a close-knit group.

When 1st grade ended, it was decided that both Jay and Noah would benefit from spending time in a mainstream class.  I was really grateful that Jay had his friend with him for that transition.  It went as smoothly as could be expected and both boys were doing well.  The one down-side, if it could be considered that, was that I don’t think they made much effort to mingle with the other students in the new class.  Each had the other and they were happy with that.

Noah and his family moved out of state last month.

Jay was sad and I was sad for him.

I was also worried about what his social life would look like at school now.

For last weeks homework assignment Jay was to make holiday cards for  some of his classmates.  When I read it, my heart dropped.  I imagined him not having anyone he wanted to make a card for – And worse – Him not receiving any in return.

I kept my fears to myself and he set out to make the cards.


The cards were awesome.  He carefully drew a different picture on each.  A very festive Christmas tree for one, Santa in a sleigh (complete with reindeer) for another and so on.

On the inside of each he wrote:


To [Child’s Name]

From Jay

Thank you for being my friend.

Merry Christmas


I asked Jay if the kids he made the cards for were his friends and he said yes.  I asked him if he was happy in his class and he said yes; adding that he loves his teacher.



I’m not really sure if he’s gotten close to any one in particular but it does seem as though he’s assimilating nicely into his class and that the other children have been welcoming to him and understanding of him.  They all greet him warmly in the morning and say cheerful goodbyes when we leave in the evening.  If we see any of his classmates at the playground they invite him to play with them and he sometimes obliges.

I was worried when we decided to put him into the mainstream class and I was worried when I heard that his best bud was leaving but it seems that he’s getting along nicely both socially and (based on his latest report card) academically.




2 Responses to “Post Noah”

  1. Awesome!! I was concerned when my son started middle school (7th grade) this fall, that he’d have a hard time with bullies because he’s amazingly sensitive (he feels other people’s emotions a bit too much). Imagine my surprise when he began to tell me stories of how he’s been dealing with one kid in particular. His strategy has been to bamboozle him with confusion. The kid was calling Little Man a fag. So Little Man came back at him with, “what? you want a flag?” The kid repeated himself, calling my son a fag. So Little Man changed it up a little bit and said, “oh! You want to give me a flag?” Then the other kids around joined in with Little Man saying, “oh! I’ll take a flag too. Great!” Pretty soon the offending kid got so frustrated with trying to upset my son that he gave up. I was never so proud (and surprised at how he handled things). Even though I think it hurts him a little bit to know that he’s different from a lot of kids at school, he’s also able to embrace being different and being funny.

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