I’m going to share with you how to have a successful camping trip. You know … in case any of you decide to go camping in the middle of a thunder-storm like we did this past weekend. Apparently that’s our thing. Last year we went during hurricane Irene.
First off, you need to be the last in your group to get to the camp site. Say you have to work a half day or something but definitely be fashionably late. That way, when you do get there, your tent will already be up and the only thing you have to do is place your bag inside. Sweet deal huh?!
You will still have to pump up your air mattresses, but you can get your children to take care of that so no biggie.
Then, because it will be raining when it’s time to make dinner (and also breakfast), you need to have friends (or a husband) who’s willing to stand beside you and hold an umbrella over your head while you cook. I’m not an octapus guys.
Your children will need entertainment. We found that some sort of TV access (i-pad hooked up to portable speakers), sand, water-guns and a body of water work best. That body of water can be a lake, a pool or the green bucket you usually keep your bathroom cleaning supplies in.
You need to have men who are willing and able to climb trees. What for you ask? Stay with me people. To hang the tarp that will shelter you from the rain.
There absolutely need to be people who have no shame what-so-ever and who will gladly embarrass themselves singing karaoke. You also need jiffy pop so the spectators will have something to throw at the bad singers.
(Sorry folks, some pictures and videos should never see the light of day. I mean what if I decide to run for President one day?)
OK, I’ll give you a hint. Bohemian Rhapsody.
You need marshmallows of course. Crabs, chicken, bacon and a fully stocked bar. *hiccup*
The one down side is the bugs. Last year we didn’t have any but we weren’t quite as lucky this time around. We were prepared though and if you can improvise you’ll be fine. Like, using a soda bottle to hold bug destroyers. Works like a charm.
You need one person who has an obsessive need to clean – so you don’t have to do it – and you need people who you can tease about being fat or old or racist or alcoholics or peeping toms and they’ll give it right back to you because that’s what people who truly love each other do when they get together.
Above all, you need to go with people who you trust will still be your friends when the weekend is over. These people will see you when you first wake up. (Bed head, no make up, funky breath and all). They will see you with cruddy, black finger and toe nails. They will hear you yelling at your children. When they see your son holding a flaming log, they will take it away from him instead of saying “It’s ok, he’s just playing with it.” One of your children may even dump sand directly and purposely on top of their childrens heads. (Kyle, Jay is sorry. I’m sure of it. Kinda).
We def chose the right group to camp with. Only the best kinds of people will literally carry your husband on their shoulders.
Throw in a dash of cuddles from your son
a buzz lightyear sleeping bag
and then have the kids help with the packing up and there you have it.
An amazing weekend of camping in the New Jersey pine barrens!
I accept tips. Any amount you’re comfortable with.
P.S. As I was getting Jay changed for swimming, Ace came over with the camera and Jay just said cheese and this is what we got. I love it so I had to include it here.